Determining the family size in Nigeria is a very important discussion for about to weds and newly weds.
“Two or three,” “four or more” are often questions relatives and friends ask newly married couples regarding childbearing. But making a decision on this issue raises serious parenting concerns and therefore should be done with the following things in mind:
Money is a massive factor in deciding family size, regardless of the dismissive mantra that “It is God who gives children.” To properly cater for a child, provide good education and basic needs, money is need. Therefore, a couple having a discussion on preferred family size must consider the depth of their pockets –short term and long term.
Littering of children with the daring optimism of things getting better in the future is an expensive gamble because more often than not, things don’t get better; and even when they do, demands are so many that the condition remains.
Therefore, if you want five children, but your income can only cater for two, oblige parenting concern and reconsider your want.
A report by Lisa Rapaport on Reuters says a recent study has confirmed that: “Women who are at least 35 years old when they give birth are much more likely than younger mothers to experience a variety of major pregnancy complications.” This is a serious parenting concern for women getting married in their late thirties. You don’t want to risk your life many times giving birth to four, five children from that age!
It’s okay to nurse the desire of having a large family, but when the woman is already getting older; her safety is a big concern. Couples must consider this.
Look around you: everybody is busy in today’s world. Some people don’t even have enough time for themselves and their partners, and you wonder how much time they could have for their children.
Child raising is a serious business; time consuming and energy sapping. The more children a couple decides to have, the more time they must dedicate to the raising of the children.
Therefore, a couple who are too busy with their jobs, might consider having fewer children for whom they can provide sufficient time. It’s a serious parenting concern seeing children who get very little attention from their parents. Those children are at the risk of getting attention from strangers who might take undue advantage of them!
Last but not least, it’s important and logical that a couple mutually agrees on the number of children to have.
It smacks of selfishness when the man stands on odious patriarchal authority to declare how many children he wants, with no room for the woman –who bears the children—to voice her choice. It is equally condemnable when the woman demands a larger family despite the protests of the man who would be expected to contribute to the raising of the children.
Decisions of this nature should be mutual because child rearing is an inevitable responsibility of both parents.So the next time you want to talk to a new couple about family size in Nigeria , remember these 4 important things .